Sundays with Mother Lee

Dear Mother Lee,

I tried so hard not to write about you but I really couldn't.

The first time I met you, was in 2004, I was still an agent, taking calls and you went to my station and demanded me to pay a fine because I was wearing rubber shoes when I'm supposed to be in corporate attire. I found you intimidating and bitchy then after a few days, I was transferred to your team and we became team mates.

I don't exactly remember how we even became friends, all I know is we go to RCBC's smoking area together, which we fondly called the Lung Center, and those fifteen minute breaks started our friendship. I remember I was one of the first ones who called you Mother, because everyone used to call you Tolits. I remember how you are always earliest at the office, how you have more connections with the guards, HRs, staff than an officer itself. You have this bitchy charm that people can hardly say no.

I remember our conversations during our 15 minute smoking break, you'd fill me in with the latest, even things that I don't even know and not aware of. Sometimes, you'd pull out something weird from your pocket, like one time, you pulled out this travel size lotion that came with a naughty story and I laughed hysterically in public.

There's this one time, when we met up in Malate during Gay Pride, and that you told me you'd be wearing white and from then on you keep on reminding me, yearly about the Gay Pride event. I remember telling you that I watched Brokeback mountain for the first time and I told you that I got stressed watching it, then you said " Isn't it a story of true love?"

And how you love to scare the hell out of me when I walked alone the hallways of the RCBC building that I screamed so loud that people actually turned to stare, our American bosses asked if someone died after hearing my scandalous hallway scream.

Remember one time when we had Jollibee delivered and they were 2 hours late and we're already super hungry? Our food came for free because you fought for your and our customer rights and had gotten all managerial.

I remember getting myself in such a personal mess, and that I'm dealing with someone so difficult and then you barged in, carrying a hand bag saying " Kea, Let's go!" in all mayordoma-ish glory,  then dragged me out of the room.

You have many friends, many group of friends, and I know people don't get you sometimes.Even though you have your weaknesses, (I mean who doesn't?) underneath the bitchy and strong image, you are a softy inside.

Remember when we went to Kulas' 1st birthday Party? You talked me into getting a face paint but we negotiated to have it painted on our arms instead. I got the Pooh and I teased you a lot that night because you got "Big Bird"

Some Sundays  we usually meet up and hang out at Greenbelt. We went to this place called Solihiya who, by your recommendation, serves the best iced tea.

I was one of the selected friends that you invited to have dinner at your house in Muntinlupa, where you served probably one of the best fried chicken I've tasted. I remember how you love to cook, and you like feeding people. An account party isn't the same without you meddling, because you've always been so motherly.

Mother, even if you know that I am such a disaster in the kitchen, you're the only one, who was able to make me chop onions during our team building.

Your reason? Nothing. You just don't want to do it and just wanted to lay out in the sun and get a tan by the pool.

I remember our Sundays together mother. I remember we both went Apartment Shopping. We must have looked at every available apartment in San Antonio Village til we found the one we like. We already have plans of putting secret signs when one is in the bedroom and doing who-knows-what? We got tired walking under the sun, then you pulled out your cellphone, called a relative to pick us up then they dropped us off at Buddy's where we wolfed down their best selling pansit lucban. We like to ruin each other's diet. 

But our Apartment did not materialized because on that same year, we both had to make career moves. You moved to Marikina and I moved to PS and stayed in Makati. But I remember getting my own apartment and you gifted me with a chinese goodluck charm as house warming gift when we went to Chinatown. We always get the best and lowest rates when we shop in 168 and Tutuban, You haggle prices in Chinese,  I would just gawk, amused, watching you speak Chinese. The owners would give your the lowest rate, and we'd end up bringing home more than what we planned to buy in the first place.

Mother, we never talked about it, but I know (and I think someone have mentioned it) that you felt bad and sad that we'd be separating ways and I did not tell you my plans even though we hang out every single week night. We were just not the type to get all emotional, I mean, I am, but you hate it.

Because remember when we found out that a friend of ours got some major guy trouble and I felt bad for her and tears started welling up my eyes? 

You told me: "Fuck you!" then puffed into your Marlboro Reds, looked straight into the ceiling then I saw you fighting back those tears. That's when I knew you hate seeing people cry.

The last time I saw you was in 2008, there was never a proper goodbye, til I moved back home in 2010. We'd text sometimes, and sometimes BBM each other. I remember you, despite the distance, being there for me last year when my father was in his deathbed. You told me you cannot and couldn't come because you're weak in these scenarios and I told you it's okay and I understand.

Last year, you told me you were sick, but never had gotten the details about it, but have it checked. I have such faith and confidence that you're a fighter and whatever it is that you're going through, you'll make it. We then made plans of me visiting the city and we would re-visit the places we used to hang out and just catch up.

I remember BBM-ing you: "Love you, Mother"

And you always reply: "Love you more"

Last month, out of nowhere, I BBM'd you then gotten an error message. I guess you had your service deactivated. I saw on facebook that you lost a lot of weight, but I do hope that you're just losing wieght for improving your health. I remember you, pressuring me to enroll with you in Gold's Gym in Glorietta, to hit two birds with one stone: Get fit and Boy watch.

And now, without goodbyes, you're gone. It's too soon, again without proper goodbye. I would always remember our fun times together, our friendship is not perfect but it was worth keeping. I'd like to thank you for every thing, every little thing, good or bad. 

I know you don't want us to see you in a sad state, but I want you to know that you are loved, Mother Lee. 

You are loved. 

May you rest in peace and have fun cooking in heaven.