F*ck the 5 year plan

Would you believe that before my college graduation, I had plans A, B, C, and D?

Plan A was to be a creative writer for TV networks. Plan B was to start as editorial assistant in a magazine publishing company. Plan C was to go to school again and pursue 2 years of Information Technology course since I already have my Bachelor's degree anyway. Plan D was to apply in a call center - I had no idea what that is until over coffee one day, Chichi, my college roommate (who graduate a year ahead of me) told me that if you want to earn a big salary, fast, work in a call center. I was itching for independence that time so I said I will give call center industry a year then move on to my dream job.

I stayed for six years in the BPO (call center) industry, started in an entry level agent, assistant trainer, QA monitor, QA Lead and finally a Operations Supervisor/Team Lead before I hit quarter-life crisis at 26 and quit my job.

Five years ago, I remember literally dragging myself to work, just waiting for payday. I keep looking for what they call zest for life. I have a closet full of high heeled shoes, gadgets that I bought out of a whim, pricey dinners and cocktails with friends in my social calendar but that was it. My apartment was my little space of sanctuary, and on weekends I looked forward doing laundry, watching reruns of Friends and Sex and the City, go to church and cap the Sunday night with an alone time at a bookstore or a coffee shop. If I didn't have the energy, I would just call Jollibee delivery and pig out Php200 worth of junk food all by myself.

It's not like I did not try to go back to my dream. I did. In fact, I remember personally handing over my Resume at Summit Media when their office was still in Robinsons Galleria. My hands were shaking and Vic, my friend in BPO, was giving the ultimate shove to finally submit it. I did not hear from Summit. When my co-Supervisor, Jimi and I were make up shopping at an exclusive sale in a popular make up brand's head office, I realized I want to work there. Very timely that I saw a friend of mine who works there and referred me to their Human Resource Department.

When I did not hear from any of my applications, I figured out, okay I will give this BPO industry one last try until something better comes along. I got an interview with another company, they raved about my performance, honestly I also had great references and inside connections, but that was it. I came home to Laguna one summer weekend and got jealous by my friends laid back life and how they all seem to be okay with it. My parents suggested graduate school, but it was already too late to start the first semester.

It was in the middle of an absent-minded interview that I decided to go for Graduate School. The interviewer asked me to tell something about myself and all I was able to say was..." I'm Kea and currently I am a Operations Team Lead, I like reading books, hanging out with friends, going out of town, (and then realized I sounded like such a total blah, then added)...and this year I will start my Masteral Degree."

You know, they say, when you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen for you. Because exactly two weeks later, I was able to file my resignation and pursue my graduate studies at the start of the first semester. I thought, I would just finish my degree for two years and go back to the city armed with a new degree. Well, that was the plan and that was in 2010.

Borrowing from Karen's Salmansohn's words, "In five years, 5 years ago I never would have envisioned my life the way it is today.". In five years I have:

1. Moved back and lived with my folks and just when I thought I couldn't handle parental guidance again, it turned out to be nice.
2. Lost some long-time friends and understood why it happened for the best.
3. Lost my father, two years after moving back home. To this day, I think this is the ultimate reason why the universe had to uproot me from the city. I do not want to regret not having spent time with the last two years of my father's life.
4. Made new friends, like quality friends. Some people think they are too old to make new ones, but I got really lucky. I starts with the age old advice that if you want a good friend, you have to be good one. I got lucky to have reconnected and established friends from high school (apart from the circle that I kept all these years).
5. Earned my MS Degree after 3 years. I've also been a working student for 3 semesters.
6. Traveled to places I never really seriously planned visiting like Japan, for instance.
7. Worked for the government. I never planned on working for the government, but here I am.
8. Helped launch my sister's floral designing business and eventually got into the wedding industry (since I've been behind-the-wedding-scenes since 2011)
9. Finally found a job that I actually like. I used to think that I probably will never find a job that I like doing, but I got it, most of the time. And I am grateful. Ate Ting, one of my college roommate, told me that it is easy to find a job, but the hard part is finding the job that you love.
10. Made peace with my past and myself...and honestly I have a better, personal relationship with God.

And all of these are not really in my concrete plans. Sure, I do not have a house to show or a car to brag, but I have secret little victories that I earned in those 5 years. Sometimes, I fear the future. I sometimes ask if it's still necessary to plan. When I turned 30, I kept bugging my 30+ friends what to expect in my thirties. Sure, my twenties were a lot of fun, so much fun that I look back with a smile on my face thinking "I can't believe I did that". My friends told me that thirties will cover the big decisions that one will make in their lives. I want to at least be prepared for what's in store for me as a precaution. But then last year, I saw this on Facebook:

"If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans..."

And when I feel anxious about the future (which is often), I am grateful to have found this on pinterest: